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Niharika Rawat


Reclaiming All Things Girly: Stop Deriding Femininityverified tick

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5 months ago
5 months ago
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Forget boys – even women sometimes balk at the idea of accepting and enjoying things that are girly, ranging from the color pink and sundresses to chick-flicks and boy bands. Indeed, we are often wrongly taught that in order to be feminist, we need to distance ourselves from the feminine, which can not possibly be farther from the truth. It is high time we start living the way we want to, and not out of fear of society’s judgement.

Source - (Wordpress)

It is funny, isn’t it, how boy bands are almost always dismissed – not being musically talented enough, not ‘authentic’ enough, not really shaping or changing the history of music. This often comes despite the fact that these bands, ranging from One Direction and BTS to Beatles, have broken records, made billions, have global fan following, and established genres. When you think about it, the only bands that receive critical acclaim and respect are the heavy metal or rock bands. Experts with musical knowledge may point out to many things that make the latter more worthy of respect than the former, but what even they cannot deny is the simple fact that boy bands often lose out on respect simply because they have a large female following.

The flip side of this phenomena is that many girls consciously chose to distance themselves from such bands, and even other artists (such as Swift and Bieber), simply because they do not want to be labelled as a ‘crazy fangirl’, or too feminine. It is the sad reality of society today that many girls try to cultivate traditionally masculine interests, from video games to dressing styles, simply because they do not want to seem to feminine. And that is for good reason. After all, haven’t we all seen the way these ‘girly girls’ are treated? Airheaded, naïve, conforming, submissive, and even non-feminist are all tags very easily associated with pink and wedge heels.

Source - (Odyssey)

There is absolutely nothing wrong with liking video games, or biking, or wrestle mania. But there should also be nothing wrong with liking dress up and glitter and chick-lit books. Instead of mocking girls who wear makeup or post cute aesthetics, we should ask ourselves why we mock them in the first place. It is not like we are all allergic to pink or glitter. It’s not as if they are harming us by indulging in all this.

In fact, think about it. How is it that women can engage in power dressing and rock suits and biker jackets and baggy t-shirts, but the moment a man even wears the color red or pink, forget about skirts or something else gender-nonconforming, that he is relentlessly mocked and his sexual orientation called into question? It is almost as if we are taught to mock and deride femininity in people, whether it be boys or girls. Masculinity is well and good in females to a certain extent, and complete necessity in boys – god forbid their tear glands ever work.

Source - (Woman Magazine)

Some may argue, in the spirit of feminism, that women should not conform to societal norms about the feminine. Yes, they should not – only if they wish not to. Girls should not be stopped from riding bikes and enjoying video games, but girls should also not be stopped from listening to boy bands or wearing pastels and glitter. Neither should boys be, for that matter. People should be allowed to do whatever they want, till the point they don’t harm others. Indulging in feminine activities doesn’t always mean that you are bowing to patriarchy. In fact, it might require a special type of bravery to be true to yourself in this way, given that your own sisters may turn against you so easily, even as the rest of the society looks down upon you. 

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